Archive for the ‘sleep’ Category
February 19th, 2010
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I always enjoy reading the "funny things kids say" threads and discussing them with friends. (Except, of course, when they're not really that funny but the parents' think they are). I have a funny one I thought I'd share with you, in the hopes that you find it funny too (and if not you can nod and smile and pretend I'm funny).
Last week, after several days (and by several I mean SEVEN LONG DAYS) alone with the kids because of the snow storm I was at my wits end. They were being relatively good, but we were all feeling cooped up and bored with our routine of finding creative things to do in the house. Ben was being unusally cranky by the seventh day (he was also fighting a cold).
This is the boy that never naps. In fact, he doesn't sleep much at all. Some days he really needs a nap…but getting him to take one is a challenge (and by challenge, I mean pain in the ass).
I dediced to try the "lay all the couch cushions on the floor, pop in a movie and pretend we're camping" approach, hoping he would fall asleep.
And guess what, he did! Less than half way into the movie he konked right out. Matthew stayed awake to watch the whole movie.
Less than an hour into the nap of all naps (which, when I can get him to sleep, will last hours…long, peaceful hours), I got up to go into the other room for ONE MINUTE.
One lousy minute!
And then I heard arguing. It went something like "uh uh! Nut uh! ut uh! Nut uh!" and there were two little voices, not just one.
It didn't make sense, Ben was asleep!
Ben proceeded to wake up and be EXTREMELY grumpy (the only thing that makes him more grumpy than not taking a nap when he needs one is being woken up from a nap before he's done napping) and I yelled for Matthew to come in and demanded he explain why (oh, god why!?!) Ben was awake.
And he said….(wait for it…)
Well, well, well….I woke him up to tell him he was sleeping.
No joke.
Somehow I don't think he'll end up in Gifted Education. 
So what funny logic have your kids come up without of the blue?
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I always enjoy reading the "funny things kids say" threads and discussing them with friends. (Except, of course, when they're not really that funny but the parents' think they are). I have a funny one I thought I'd share with you, in the hopes that you find it funny too (and if not you can nod and smile and pretend I'm funny).
Last week, after several days (and by several I mean SEVEN LONG DAYS) alone with the kids because of the snow storm I was at my wits end. They were being relatively good, but we were all feeling cooped up and bored with our routine of finding creative things to do in the house. Ben was being unusally cranky by the seventh day (he was also fighting a cold).
This is the boy that never naps. In fact, he doesn't sleep much at all. Some days he really needs a nap…but getting him to take one is a challenge (and by challenge, I mean pain in the ass).
I dediced to try the "lay all the couch cushions on the floor, pop in a movie and pretend we're camping" approach, hoping he would fall asleep.
And guess what, he did! Less than half way into the movie he konked right out. Matthew stayed awake to watch the whole movie.
Less than an hour into the nap of all naps (which, when I can get him to sleep, will last hours…long, peaceful hours), I got up to go into the other room for ONE MINUTE.
One lousy minute!
And then I heard arguing. It went something like "uh uh! Nut uh! ut uh! Nut uh!" and there were two little voices, not just one.
It didn't make sense, Ben was asleep!
Ben proceeded to wake up and be EXTREMELY grumpy (the only thing that makes him more grumpy than not taking a nap when he needs one is being woken up from a nap before he's done napping) and I yelled for Matthew to come in and demanded he explain why (oh, god why!?!) Ben was awake.
And he said….(wait for it…)
Well, well, well….I woke him up to tell him he was sleeping.
No joke.
Somehow I don't think he'll end up in Gifted Education.
So what funny logic have your kids come up without of the blue?
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It's a wonder I'm not thin. Really. You do the math.
We have 14 stairs from our first floor to our second floor. Up + down = 28 steps. I have two kids, each of which gets out of bed approximately 429 times on a given night.
28 x 429 x 2 = skinny, right?
What is it with bedtime? Why do my kids get so needy at bedtime? Generally we close and lock the gate at the top of the steps so they stand there and scream for us with a dozen different excuses. I've occasionally left the gate open and Matthew the good kid that he is, will still stand at the top of the steps. Ben, on the other hand, will wander down and scare the living daylights out of us when he magically appears out of nowhere.
The littany of excuses is comical, really. We usually get the "I have to go to the bathroom" (just go!) and I need covered up (If you hadn't have gotten out of bed and therefore uncovered yourself, you'd still be covered).
The times that make me laugh are when (Matthew usually) doesn't even have an excuse and he has to try to think of a reason that he dragged me all the way up those 14 long steps (and probably woke up his brother "whispering" MOM!! at the top of his little lungs). He stands there, so serious and says "uuuuummmmmmm….uuummmmmm, I……just……..ummmmm" and then what follows is usually good for chuckle.
We've gotten:
-I need my toe covered up (seriously)
-Take my empty cup!
-I dropped my bear (while he walked right by said dropped bear to come and tell me that his bear was on the ground)
-I'm scared
-I love you and miss you
-I need to pee again (four times in a row and I get suspect)
-I don't want the blanket on me
-Is tomorrow show-and-tell day?
-I need to brush my teeth
-I need to wash my hands
-I don't want to watch the baby move (don't ask me, I'm still clueless)
I think I'll start offering housework if they get out of bed. It seems like they'll do just about anything if it means a reason to get out of bed. Is it wrong to make a four-year-old scrub toilets?
So what crazy bedtime excuses have you gotten?
And what's your bedtime strategy? Keep going up and putting them back in their beds? Leave them alone and hope they'll fall asleep somewhere? Lock them in their rooms so they can't keep coming out?
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